I was rejected 11 times in 2023
I want to be a published writer, whatever being a ‘published writer’ means in 2024. Ill write about being a writer who earns money in another post.
Anyway, I know that I have to accept that I can spend hours on a short story, or chapter of a novel, or a poem before sending it off - sometimes with a hefty submission fee - then possibly never hearing anything about it again. Ghosted by writing competitons and awards. Or receivnig the old “thanks for your submission but…” email.
So, how do you deal with rejections? How do you deal with not even hearing back from the majority of the places you submit to? How do you overcome those internal battles and voices that tell you you’re afraid of failing, of being rejected, of your writing not being good enough? All so you can keep on applying.
I want to share what I’ve learned on this writing journey of mine, as honestly and vulnerably as I can so that you can learn from my rejections, and hopefully not feel so bad if you get rejected a few times yourself. Here are my 5 pieces of advice:
GET COMFORTABLE WITH REJECTION
Invariably, wanting to be a published writer means that I have to get comfortable with my writing being rejected or not being accepted. Unless I self publish everything that I write, which of course is an option, I have to acknolwedge that my writing might not hit the mark, and it might not win a competition or be accepted for publication. That’s fine, it’s part of the process of writing. I use it as fuel to wat to write more and write better. I will keep trying. I will keep writing. Feeling comfortable about this fact means Im not so afraid to submit again.
2. EASE IN GENTLY
Following your dreams, achieving your goals, takes perseverance, effort, grit, time, energy, money, it takes everything that you have, and so you have to want it more than you want anything else.
In 2023 I decided to start submitting my writing to as many different opportunities as I could but I decided to ease in gently. I chose some free competitions first. It felt like it was lower stakes. There are so many open calls and compeititons that are free to enter so why not give those a go? Get a feel for the process before jumping into the super exepnsive ones with awesome prizes that you secretly have your heart set on. It did get easier after every submission and now, after 12 submissions, and only 1 partial acceptance (an 8.333% acceptance rate), I am prepared to keep submitting regardless of the outcome. Below is a list of the things I applied to and the cost.
Snack Mag - free
Scottish New Writers Award - free
Outcrop Poetry - free
Edinburgh Award for Flash Fiction 2024 - £7
Spit it Out x Push the Boat Out - free
Mslexia Flash Fiction competition - £12
Aesthetica Short Story - £18
Mslexia Short Story competition - £16
Manchester Met Fiction Prize - £12
MOAN zine - free - Accepted!
The Dinesh Allirajah Prize for Short Fiction 2024 - free
Bloomsbury Development Opportunity - free
3. CELEBRATE YOUR SUCCESSES NO MATTER HOW SMALL
One acceptance! Wahoo! I had a poem accepted! This brings me on to tip number 3. You must must must must must celebrate your successes no matter how big, or how small your mind tells you that they are. I have to celebrate this, because it’s amazing, I’m proud that someone accepted something I wrote to put into print. MOAN partially accepted my poem about nipples (yes, I wrote a poem about nipples, they’re a fascinating and wonderful part of our body!) Partially accepted because they asked if they could chop the poem I submitted down a wee bit and of course, I was happy to oblige.
I can’t wait to get my hands on a copy of it. It’s the second time I’ve had a poem published in Moan actually. I love it as a zine, as a movement, I love its purpose which is “A big Fuck You to the complexities of society which oppress, limit and shame sexual liberation, education, freedom and experimentation“ - go and support everything they do here - https://moanzine.com/shop
You really have to celebrate your successes otherwise you will be brought down by your rejections.
4. TALK TO OTHER WRITERS
I cannot tell you what a joy it is to sit in a room full of other writers (I host Women Who Write Edinburgh) who have worked so hard, tried for so long, and have a vast range of expereince of everything to do with writing. Whether thats rejection by agents, signing a deal, publishing their own book, completing their PHD, continuing on despite feeling like they’re not getting anywhere, struggling for inspiration - you name it, theyd probably got a story to tell about it. So go out, find other writers and talk to them your rejections and failures and also celebrate your sucessess. Honestly, you’ll feel so much better and you’ll know you’re in the exact right company.
and finally… tip number 5.
5. DON’T STOP TRYING
Ok, maybe you can take a break or pause. But don’t lose hope, not in yourself, your dreams, your goals, your writing. Acknowledge any rejection you receivie, take what you can learn from it, then pick up your pen and keep going.
Rejection. A bitch it may be, but its a bitch we must befriend.
Thanks for reading,
Dominique
